Day 4 #photoadayjuly – Fun This Wordless Wednesday

FUN!

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Running Free – Silent Sunday

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No Hosepipe But A Few Fish This Wordless Wednesday

It’s another sunny day so…………..

I set this up as an after school surprise

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Abit Of Therapy

So over the weekend J and I had a “Therapy Day”, to be honest we both needed it for different reasons.

We spent the whole day doing stuff together, we did some food therapy, used Theraputty, drew pictures, blew bubbles, did puzzles and even did some painting. It was a very busy and pretty tiring day but it was just what we both needed. J was very relaxed after his day of “therapy” and spent some time relaxing with Mario and then playing with his Dad before going off to bed. Whilst he was playing Mario I started writing some things down, just to clear my head. And then once he’d gone to bed I wrote some more. I wrote from the heart, as I’ve said before I’m not great with feelings but I like to write things out. I have a few more appointments coming up over the next month that I hope will give me some answers and maybe a little more hope……….. who knows maybe they’ll even start to heal the mind games and grief that’s troubling me at the moment.

But anyhow, this is what I wrote …………….

I don’t know if I can, I don’t know if I dare

Open my heart to begin to share 

How I’m screaming inside, how I really feel

Because then I have to admit what’s happened, it’s real

*

I try so hard to lock my feelings inside

But sometimes they’re too overwhelming for me to hide

The emptiness inside fills my heart with pain

As the thoughts in my head drive me insane

*

So many thoughts going through my mind

Trying to understand why life’s so unkind

But as the words go around they hurt my head

And inside I feel nothing, I’m empty, I’m dead

*

To lose one baby too soon broke my heart

But to lose five more has torn me apart

My heart’s trying so very hard to understand

Why we’ll never get to hold their hands

*

It doesn’t make sense, I keep thinking “why not?”

And then “Should we be happy with what we’ve got?”

But maybe, just maybe I want a repeat of the joy

That I get each and everyday from my special boy

*

But there’s a pain inside, the scars run deep

It overflows and wounds begin to weep

I don’t know what to do, again do we try?

How?   When all of our hope has run dry

*

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Just Needed To Write Something Down……………..

I’m not really sure what to write, I not really sure what I want to say………….. in fact I’m not really sure of much at the moment

It’s been a rough couple of weeks in the MumtoJ house, in fact it’s been a rough couple of months. Right now I’m not sure I can explain it all, I’ve got so many thoughts and words racing through my head at the moment I just needed to write something down…………. anything! ‘Cus my brain may explode if I don’t write something down.

We seem to have had one knock after another and to be honest it’s getting harder to hold it all together at the moment. I’m finding it hard to understand why we’ve had to deal with so much crap, (sorry but couldn’t think of another word to use), and what we’ve done to deserve so much crap, (sorry again).  We keep fighting but there’s only the 3 of us against the world, hardly a fair fight is it? I often sit and chat to my Nan, crazy right? I mean she’s been dead for almost 7 years, but she listens and I don’t know who else I can talk to. If she were still here I know she would have understood. I don’t talk about my faith and my beliefs very often but to be honest I’m not sure what they are anymore either.

I’ve always found writing theraputic and with everything that I’ve got going through my head at the moment I just needed to write something down. I know this is abit of a rambling post and to be quite honest I’m not sure I care whether you’ve made it to the end of this post, maybe you decided to give it a miss after the first line…………. If you made it to the end, thanks for sticking with it and sorry for rambling.

Time to put the smile on and hope everything really does happen for a reason …………….. a good reason!

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Working On Those Fine Motor Skills

Over the last few weeks we’ve been working really hard on J’s fine motor skills and his low muscle tone (in his hands). It’s an area that he struggles in, he hates writing and often says that it’s too hard and his hands hurt or they’re tired. So we’ve been trying to find different fun ways to aid his development in these areas.

using playdough

We started by using playdough using his hands to manipulate the dough into shapes to create models and then moved on to tougher things like Theraputty and clay which is much harder to manipulate. We’ve also used scissors to cut the playdough up, scissors are something J has always struggled with and still does, however he has made huge progress with these skills.

Theraputty is pretty handy stuff

The Theraputty is much tougher than playdough and so gives his muscle tone and fine motor skills a really good workout First we rolled the Theraputty into a long snake and then J used his index finger to make small indentations all the way along the snake. I then placed a box of marbles on J’s left side and asked him to place a marble into each dent that he had made but he was only allowed to use his right index finger and thumb to pick the marbles up. This not only worked on his fine motor skills but also mathematical skills (he created patterns whilst lining them up along his snake, without being asked to do so) and he had to cross his middle, which is something his OT and his teacher at the EI centre have both told us he needs to work on. Next I hid some new marbles and small balls in the Theraputty and told J if he could get them out of the Theraputty he could keep them, I’ve also hidden little toy bugs and animals (you know the one kind you buy for party bags) and done the same thing. J loves collecting little things like this so it’s something that works well Then to finish up we’ve been making handprints in the Theraputty, pushing down hard to make each print.

making patterns with pasta

We tried to get creative with our fine motor skills, working on J’s OCD “dirty” issues too. He doesn’t like to do alot of arty things involving paint, glue etc and it can take alot of bribery encouragement to convince him to take part in messy art. So we did panting with a twist I put together a couple of pots of a food colouring mixture and explained that it was the same thing that we put into his rainbow cakes. Then we got out some pasta and soaked it in the various pots. J took the pasta out of each pot using his finger and thumb (way to go for those fine motor skills!) and placed the pasta onto sheets of kitchen roll. This is where he got creative, the food colouring soaked into the kitchen roll creating patterns. We ended up with several pictures and ofcourse the coloured pasta which he also enjoyed making patterns with.

We’ve spent time writing in various things in a bid to improve his letter formation and again his fine motor skills. We’ve written in playdough with kebab skewers, we’ve written in flour (thanks Fi for this fab idea) and shaving foam and have formed letters with matchsticks (the coloured arty kind not actual matchsticks). We also been working on his pencil grip and handwriting with a little help from Mario, Smurfs and Angry Birds. J hates writing and so again by using some of his favourite things to help, it’s made it a little more fun for him. We’ve had great results so far, J is now holding a pencil further down, closer to the nib and is also now holding it with just 3 fingers instead of 4……………. Well Done Little Man, Mummy’s very proud, you’ve worked really hard

Some of J’s work……

Dad's Papa Smurf

 

Mum's a Smurfette

Angry Birds by J

 

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Mum’s A Smurf!

Today I faced one of my fears…………. please refrain from laughing…………………… I made playdough for J!

I’ve always had a fear of playdough………….. the way it feels, the way it smells……….. everything about it!

I had promised J earlier in the week that I would make him some (he loves the stuff!) and I should have known better than to think he might forget because J never forgets!

So we got all the ingredients out ready, (cream of tartar, plain flour, salt, food colourings, a dash of cooking oil) and put the kettle on for the boiling water that we needed.

We made a variety of different colours and I encouraged J to tell which colours I needed to mix together to make the other colours that he wanted, like purple, orange and green

We even mixed glitter into two batches to give J a different sensory experience

  Whilst I hate playdough J loves it and it does have its uses. J gets to exercise his fine motor skills and work on his muscle tone.

Ofcourse the downside to making your own playdough (apart from having to touch it!) is that food colouring stains…… badly!

J thinks it’s hilarious that Mummy has blue hands and has been giggling since we made the playdough, declaring “Mum’s turning into a Smurf!”

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We Created A Rainbow Of Colour

We’ve had a colourful start to the weekend

Yesterday I decided to start having another huge sort out and when you have a child who collects everything, trust me there’s alot to sort out! As a reward for being such a good sport about the big sort out (which has continued on into today) and for allowing us to put together a bag of things for the Salvos, a box for ebay and a huge bag of rubbish (J collects packaging!), I told him we could do any art activity that he wanted. (Ofcourse without him realising we’ll also be working on his OCD clean issues and his fine motor skills)

J asked if he could tie dye a t-shirt. I bought some things a little while ago in order to do this but have been waiting for J to be interested enough in doing it. He seemed very excited and couldn’t wait to get started so I grabbed the opportunity with both hands, afterall he doesn’t very often want to do messy art.

 First we made the dye up in little squirty bottles (he didn’t want to put his hands too close to the dye, hence the use of bottles).

Then I helped J put a collection of elastic bands (yes he collects those too!) around the t-shirt in a variety of different places, great use of his fine motor skills

Then it was time for the messy bit!  He had a ball squirting all the different colours over our elastic band tied shirt.

We left it to dry in the sun and after removing the elastic bands (more fine motor work), discovered the rainbow of colour that we had created.

Looks pretty good doesn’t it?

I’m amazed and so proud that he had a go at something so messy, six months ago J wouldn’t have even come close to doing something like this. Yes it doesn’t happen very often and he still hates being messy but just look at what he’s created and how far he’s come in a short space of time

Bring on the messy play…………………….

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A Mixed Bag………..

We’ve had 2 meetings this week both of which have created a mixed bag of emotions.

The first meeting was with a new OT, The OT and Speechy that we were seeing at the end of last year was a complete waste of time. Alot of our funding was used up and no progress was made, no sensory diet created………nothing. We were under the impression that this was one of the only places in our area to go, that accepted the funding, however at the beginning of this year we found a wonderful new Speech Therapist who in a short space of time has already helped a great deal and J responded well to her. It was her that gave us the details for J’s new OT, yes we will be seeing her again!

The OT that we met with was very switched on and (we felt) knew exactly what she was talking about and within 10 minutes of observing J whilst talking to us she had already picked up on a couple of J’s quirks/issues.  (very impressed)  During our hour with her she discussed the possibility hat J may have some ear problems that we should look into, he gets alot of ear infections and that along with a few of his “issues” could mean that there is a problem. This raised alarm bells with us because as a baby J was admitted to hospital overnight because he was unwell, when the Doctor “did his rounds” the next morning we were told that J had a narrow ear canal but because he was so small it would “sort itself out”, so ofcourse we are now asking ourselves if we should have pushed to investigate it further and if it is related to some of his ear issues now. The same Doctor also did some tests on J’s gut (that was the reason he was admitted overnight) and we were told that his bowel was slightly twisted but again because he was so small “it would sort itself out”. The OT that we met with this week feels that J could also have some gut problems, and so again we are wondering if we should have pushed to have it investigated further at the time…….. I guess when the experts tell you it will be ok you believe (or want to) that they know what they’re talking about and so leave it at that. *sigh*   Anyhow she has recommended that we see our GP and get a referral to a Dietician/Nutritionist, an Allergist and to get his ears sorted. Unfortunately we don’t have the best GP and so before we can sort all of the above out I have to search out a new GP……………..asap!  On the upside we were very impressed with the new OT and despite it being abit of a drive to see her we will definitely be going back to her

Our second meeting this week was not so great………………………. you’ve guessed it …………. the school!

It started badly when it was assumed Hubby would be outside playing with J and not part of the meeting…………….. he became a little cross at this suggestion and let rip at the Psychologist who went outside to chat to him. I should point out at this point that this was Psychologist who had been invited to the meeting despite the fact that she had never met any of us before and as nice as she was, she didn’t know any of us or anything about our situation. Also attending the meeting was the Principal, who had also never met any of us before, (I guess in a school so big it would be hard to know every pupil but since they get extra funding because J attends you would think they might make an effort to know who the special kids are that they are getting the extra funding for).

Anyhow once Hubby and everyone else was inside the meeting began. We tried to explain some of the issues we had been having and some of the things that J had told us but yet again felt like we had wasted 90 minutes. We told them that J had informed us that *Billy* had been mean to him and was bullying him, the response we got was smiles and nods……………. if they know it’s happening why haven’t they addressed this issue?!?!?!   We went through various issues with them and basically got the general feeling that we weren’t being listened to at all. We felt like we were going around in circles…………………… To wrap the meeting up the Principal asked if they were to work on the food thing and if that was what they should be doing………………….. I responded with “Well just getting him to school should be first!”        Do you see why we felt we weren’t listened to at all, how on earth did she get that his food issues were something to be worked on first when we had been explaining some of J’s issues with school and just how much he doesn’t want to go school and some of the behaviour we receive as a result of him not wanting to go to school?!?!?

Anyhow, we’re now counting down the days until we go to see the Surgeon about Hubby’s back and hoping for good news, (although the way this year is going so far, maybe we’re hoping for too much). After we have seen the Surgeon and we know what’s going on with Hubby’s back we will be making some important decisions about our future. If we get the good news that we are hoping for J may be ending his time at that school sooner rather than later and when we are searching for his new school we will be taking with us a list of questions to ask the school and a tick sheet of requirements, (smaller class sizes will be top of the list, as this is one of J’s biggest issues with his Prep class). Until then we just carry on as we are and wait and see……………………….

Oh and J is off school again today, because when you’ve been up most of the night and you feel the way that Hubby and I are feeling about the school, when you have your child screaming, crying (real tears, not the temper tantrum type) and physically begging you not to make him go to school, you’re just too tired and heartbroken to fight………….. what would you do?…………………………….. maybe I should ask his teachers that next week!

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A Sensory Fun Day!

I’ve finally started to feel a little better physically so today I thought it would be nice to have a sensory fun day with J.

We started our day by making some playdough, it’s a simple mixture……….2 cups of plain flour, 4 tablespoons of cream of tartar, 2 tablespoons of cooking oil, 1 cup of salt, 2 cups of boiling water and food colouring all mixed together. J had great fun adding (and feeling) the ingredients as we mixed them together, obviously I mixed the boiling water

We made 3 different colours and even put sequins and sparkles into one batch for abit of extra sensory fun

We’ve also made some fantastic creations with J’s moonsand. I can’t recommend this to enough people, it’s great sensory fun and it doesn’t dry out, it’s pretty solid and so if like me you have a little perfectionist the thing they are trying to build won’t keep  collapsing………….. it’s very easy to build with

J has also played in his bodysock, (very funny to watch), dressed up as a sock monster but putting socks on his hands/arms and feet/legs, (he used Daddy’s socks because they were bigger and he even managed to put them on himself!) and we made a rice and balloon stressball.

I also thought it might be a good time to work on strengthening his fine motor skills and muscles, (J has low muscle tone), so out came the theraputty.

Without a doubt the thing that J has enjoyed the most today was food therapy.

Today along with the usual things (apple, banana, bread etc) I thought I’d give jelly a go…………….. J thought it was FAB! He squished his hands through it, used his playdough toys, drew things with his fingers and just had lots of sensory fun!

 

 

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