This is the name that J has given to a day that he and I spend together doing whatever, (within reason of course), he wants to do. It’s a day that I don’t switch the computer on until our special time has finished, usually when Daddy gets home. It’s a day when J gets to choose what games we play or which movies we watch. It’s a day when J gets to choose what we have for lunch and where we eat it. It’s a day that we had today.
It started last night at his bedtime, as I tucked J into bed and gave him a kiss and a cuddle, (when he’d finished his usual routine), he asked me “Can we have a special day tomorrow?” I immediately thought what a great idea, we could have a day of fun before we have our day in the city. So I quickly told him yes and he went off to sleep with a big smile on his face and I went to bed hopeful that our day of fun might mean a less stressful more relaxed day the next day when we have our train journeys and clinic appointment in the city to deal with.
When he woke up this morning, (amazingly slept through the night 2nd night in a row!), he gave us a cheery “Morning!” followed very quickly by, “Oooh don’t forget you said we could have a special day today, have you forgot?” I reassured him that I hadn’t forgotten and that I was just going to have a cup of coffee and then our day would start. He asked if he could have a couple of biscuits for breakfast, normally I would go back with something like, “you can have cereal, toast, bread or fruit”, but today was a special day. Besides once in a while won’t hurt……… he then asked if he could eat them in the living room, now he was pushing it but I told him yes if he promised not to make a mess. I explained that if he made a mess, (when he crumbed them, which I knew he would), I would have to clean the mess up and that would mean less playtime. Yes I could have said he would have to clean it up but with his dirt/mess issues that would never happen and even suggesting it could have set him off and I didn’t want meltdowns today, so anything I could do to prevent one was worth doing.
After breakfast, surprise, I had to clean all the crumbs up so out came the hoover, J doesn’t like the hoover he says it’s too loud. So I was waiting for the eruptions when he said, “Ooops sorry I didn’t mean to make a mess, I hope you’re not cross. It’s ok I know you have to hoover it up so I’ll just pretend that I can’t hear it”………. erm ok so who is this child and what have you done with J? I got it all cleaned up as quickly as I could and then moved on to getting dressed, usually more issues here………. today he asked if he could wear his pyjamas all day, I told him that was fine, we weren’t going anywhere so no problems there.
We sat together and watched Oggy and The Cockroaches, (one of his favourite cartoons) and then he asked if we could play on his Wii game. We’ve actually taken the game away for a month due to all the negative behaviour we’ve had recently and it’s also a game that I absolutely hate playing, it’s very hard to play and we quite often “die” or I do it wrong and of course these things usually lead to meltdowns. However, today was a special day so I agreed but only for 1 hour. “Deal” he said with a smile on his face, wow I had such a happy boy today! :) We had a dodgy moment during play but I put the Wii remote down and told him that I wouldn’t pick it up again until he stopped shouting and being silly…….. the shouting continued for about 10 minutes but then once he’d stopped, as promised I picked the remote up and continued playing, happy boy once again. After an hour I told him we had to turn the Wii off but we could do something else and asked him what he would like to do.
He ran to his playroom and came out with one of his Power Rangers DVD’s. With a sigh I put the DVD on and then we got the toys out, we always play with his Power Rangers whilst we watch them. Power Rangers are one of his favourite things in the world, he’s obsessed with them! We built Megazords for about 20 minutes and then we just snuggled up together and watched the rest of his DVD.
Lunch – one of the worst times in our house usually! Today J decided he wanted cheese on toast, cut into triangles, on a flower plate and he wanted to have a picnic in the living room whilst we watched more power rangers! I told him yes but only if we used the special picnic blanket, (that would collect the crumbs) ;) He didn’t eat very much and had a minor moment afterwards because he was messy but I cleaned him up told him he could change his pyjamas. I asked him if he wanted more pyjamas or if he wanted to get dressed, he replied “well I was going to put my shorts on but I can’t now because it’s afternoon and I have to get dressed in the morning” bless him! We chatted about this for a few minutes but I was getting nowhere fast and he was starting to get a little agitated so I then reminded him it was a special day so he could get dressed whenever he wanted……… seemed to do the trick.
After lunch we spent almost an hour on the Wii Fit, (bit of exercise), then spent the rest of the afternoon playing computer games, (J’s other obsession, he’s very good at computer games), and playing with his “blowers”, (I don’t actually know the name of these toys but J calls them his blowers, they’re sensory toys). Few little moments during play and when I said time to turn off the computer games but no big meltdowns.
Once Daddy arrived home our special day was over but he has continued to play nicely, (he’s playing with Daddy now), with only a few minor moments, no big meltdowns today, which is fantastic!
I don’t how bedtime will go because that’s a whole different story but J seems very relaxed today and a result of his good mood is that I’m feeling more relaxed and a little less anxious about tomorrow. I know it’s still going to be a tough day, for both of us, but I hope that having our special day today will somehow have a positive effect on both of us tomorrow. :)
