I Love You Mum!

J rarely does arty things anymore and when he does do something he usually uses stickers, pencils and pens. W usually get drawn lots of mazes, treasure maps, aliens, baddies, (from his computer games or power rangers) or bugs, his favourites are ants and butterflies. Occasionally we get other animals, he drew a seahorse that was particularly good a couple of months ago, unfortunately we don’t have it anymore because he insisted on sending it to Nanny C.

He never really draws people, smiley faces but never people. He can draw people and drew his first person when he was 2, obviously a picture that we’ve laminated and is in his keepsake box. But lately no people.

So I thought i’s share this with you  

Obviously another that has been laminated………………..particularly loving the long legs. What I really love about this drawing is the attention to detail, he’s even drawn my hair tied up and my glasses, bless him…………

VERY PROUD MUMMY!  

J has a fascination with numbers, (I’m told this is very common with ASD children), he loves the Numberjacks and is a great mathematician. He doesn’t write very often, he struggles to hold a pen/pencil correctly and tends to grab it rather than hold it but we’re working on it. Anyway letters and writing are just 2 things that don’t interest him, (school is going to be fun  LOL),  although he can spell and write his name.

So I thought I’d share this with you too

WOW!

I LOVE YOU TOO BABY, MUMMY’S VERY PROUD!      XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Read Full Post »

A Face Full of Food

This week Tara at Sticky Fingers has made the theme for The Gallery Food.

J hasn’t always had a thing about being messy and whilst he’s always been a picky eater, (he has a very limited diet), he’s always loved a piece of cake.  These photographs are some of my favourites, they were taken a couple of years ago on  J’s 2nd birthday.

Doesn’t it look yummy!

Maybe I should take a bite just to try it!  :)

mmmmmm yep it’s really good, I’ll get stuck in!

Ok had enough now thanks mum!

Read Full Post »

One of Those Days!

OMG What a day!

Last week I’d said to J that we could go to the beach today if it wasn’t raining and it was mentioned again last night so we got up the morning, sun was shining and after saying goodbye to Daddy the first thing he said to me was “can we go to the beach now please?”  I told him yes we could but first we had to have breakfast, get dressed and I needed to check my email, (I’ve been waiting for something for a few days) and we had to pop to the shop quickly to get some milk and bread. I usually try to avoid the supermarket with J but since he was off playgroup last week due to a therapist appointment I didn’t have chance to do a shop and the fridge was getting low on essentials.

With a little moan and abit of a face pull he sat and ate 2 cereal bars whilst watching cartoons and I went to check my email.  That’s when the fun began!  We’ve been having problems getting the wireless adapter to connect to the router/modem and I’d planned on calling our internet supplier, (IS), when J was at playgroup next but today it decided it was 100% not going to connect.  So I called IS and was told I had to move my desktop to the other room so that it could be connected via the cable and then they could re-connect the wireless adapter for me. GRRRRRR! Unplugged everything, set it all up on the kitchen floor, (near the phone socket), and called them again.  Unfortunately this time I got to speak to a very unhelpful man who not only told me that he couldn’t do it because I couldn’t connect to the internet with my desktop and I need to buy a laptop, (WTF!), but he also made a point of telling me that it was a bad line, he couldn’t hear me very well because of the screaming child in the background and maybe I could shut him up!! J shouts, screams and generally makes a fuss everytime I’m on the phone, but seriously did that mean that the customer service representative had the right to be so rude – I think not!  Needless to say connection problem was not fixed.

So onto next job, after the joys of finding the right clothes and dressing little man, shops.  Constant whining in the car on the way to the supermarket, we parked the car and then it happened………… complete meltdown! He screamed, he kicked, he scratched, he yelled, he hit me……… the works and some lovely lady decided to poke her nose in  to tell me “you really shouldn’t let him do that to you” , really, do you really think I was letting him do that to me………. really! She followed it with “some kids get away with everything and have no respect” at which point I’d gone past my “I’ve had enough” point and came back at her with “He’s an autistic child what’s your excuse?!” She glared and walked away, ok I know I should have just ignored her and it didn’t  help the situation but it made me feel a little better. lol

Thankfully meltdown only lasted about 20 minutes and he only managed to throw a couple of apples, (whoops!), we finished the shopping and then headed home with it all. He then decided that he needed some cheese and crackers to eat, so whilst he was eating, (hardly going to say no am I, not when he’s actually asking for food!), I thought I’d take the opportunity to call IS once more to sort my connection problem out. To my surprise I actually managed to go through to a very helpful lady who sorted the problem in about 5 minutes. Maybe this day was going to start getting better?

We got everything ready for the beach, because he was still going on about going and when we’ve said we’ll do something, with J you can’t  just not do it because he will not stop until we’ve done it. When we arrived at the beach he decided that he wanted to play in the playground for a while first but when we got there he started screaming and shouting because the play equipment was hot! I tried to explain that it was because the sun was shining on it and asked if he wanted to just go to the beach. He then spent 5 minutes going back and forth saying, “well I want to play on it” and “It’s too hot I’ll just go to the beach”.

It’s the school holidays here and the beach was busier than I’ve ever seen it here…………… too busy for J! First moment was because it was busy and the people at the other end of the beach might touch his sand! Then he wanted to play in the water, I always go with him and never let him go further than knee height in because he can’t swim. Moment number 2 came when the waves were too big and got him, he complained and said that he wanted to play in the sand.  Moment number 3 came when he then said “gggrrrrrrrrrrrr NOW I’VE GOT SAND ON ME!” – Yes son that’s because it’s the beach! lol     He asked me to help him dig a hole and then hid his hands under the sand, I accidentally caught his finger with the spade, cue moment number 4. J felt the need at this point to yell as loudly as he could “Ow you hurt me! You tried to chop my finger off! You’ve cut me!” and so on.  Moment number 5 came when he decided that he needed to wash his cut, (tiniest scratch), in the sea despite me telling him that the salt water would make it sting…………….. cue screaming.   OK had enough let’s head home!

It’s the first time we’ve had a bad trip to the beach, I think it was because it was so busy, he usually has such a good time. Maybe it’s also because he’s feeling a little mixed up because he knows he’s back at playgroup tomorrow and it’s been almost 2 weeks since he was there last and he knows that schoolies will be there too.   Who knows?

Maybe today was just one of those days!

Despite everything he still managed to make me smile on the way home………..  his eyes were drooping and he was starting to fall asleep, I said to him “Are you feeling abit tired?” He got very angry and yelled “I’M NOT TIRED, MY EYES WON’T STOP BLINKING!”    

Read Full Post »

A Healthier Me!

A good friend of mine, Supersinglemum, started her weightloss challenge 4 weeks ago, (please click on the link to read more about her challenge on her blog), she’s doing fantastically well and has already lost lots of weight. Hearing how well she’s doing has inspired me to finally do something about my weight.

I’ve been wanting to lose weight for a couple of years but I haven’t actually done anything about it. To be honest with everything that’s happened in the past couple of years I just haven’t had the time or the energy to do anything about it but no more excuses!  This week I decided that I would start my own weightloss challenge.  I’m not going to do any of the weightloss programs that are out there, (weight watchers, Lite N Easy and so on), I’ve always had a problem with being told what to do, so someone, (or a specially designed program), telling me what I can and can’t eat, how much of everything I can eat etc etc is never going to work for me.  A few years ago, before J,  I lost 23lbs following my own diet and exercise plan, so I decided this was the way to go again. This time round something that I want more than the weightloss is to feel healthier. I’m determined to do it!

Thankfully J has been in a goodish mood this week, in fact we’ve only had 5 meltdowns all week and the usual “minor moments”. This good mood has meant that he’s been happy to use the Wii Fit, (with abit of negotiating), with me and so he has also gotten some exercise and we’ve had fun together. I’ve used the Wii Fit 5 times in the last 7 days, I’ve also done lots of walking, been on the exercise bike once and as usual I’ve been pretty active running around after little man J.

I’ve also made more of an effort with my diet and started cutting things back a little. This is also something that I need to work on more, what can I say I love food but I love the wrong foods! This is something I plan to continue working on more over the next few weeks. Little steps will mean that after losing weight I’ll be able to keep the weight off and maintain my new healthy lifestyle.

Overall I feel it’s been a good start and my hard work has paid off, I’ve lost 2lbs this week and as a result of all the exercise I’m already feeling a little healthier.

Goal for next week – Improve my diet further, try to eat proper meals and reduce snacking and to eat more fruit.

Exercise for 45 minutes everyday. (I’ve been doing 30 minute sessions this week)

Hopefully lose a little more weight.

Read Full Post »

Am I Too Early?

For years now family and friends have taking the mickey  and a couple of friends have made comments once again this year, even hubby thinks I’m too early.

What do you think am I too early……………… to start my Christmas shopping that is!

I always start my Christmas shopping early, usually around June. I have alot of people to buy gifts for and as we all know Christmas can be a very expensive time of year. This is made even more expensive by the amount of birthdays I have during the 4 weeks before and after the big day, a total of 14, including my hubby’s and his Dad’s. So as you can see very, very expensive time of the year for me.

So by starting early I can afford to get friends and family something nice and still have enough money to survive and to pay for a proper Christmas lunch when the big day arrives.  By starting early I can take that little bit longer to look around, try to put a little bit of thought into each gift, (I try!), and get the right gift for everyone.

I actually started a little late this year, July!  I’m just over half way through my shopping list. I keep it all stored away and don’t usually start wrapping until November but because I have to post most things to the UK I’m going to start wrapping next month. Everything will then be posted in November, Christmas post can be nightmare and I want to make sure everything gets there in time.

So what do you think am I too early?

Has anyone else started there Christmas shopping?

Read Full Post »

A Smile – The Gallery

This week Tara at Sticky Fingers has made the theme for The Gallery  A Smile.

A smile can mean so many things, for example with J a smile can mean, whoops I’ve done something I know I shouldn’t have done please don’t be cross! It can mean I love You!  It can simply mean I’m very happy and relaxed.

By smiling at someone you can also create happiness.  I’m known for my big smile, (and my big mouth at times!), and I try to always have a smile on my face, afterall in a few years when the wrinkles begin to show I’d like to have happy wrinkles rather than grumpy ones

Here’s some of the pictures that always make me smile.

This photo always makes me smile we had so much fun this day. The story behind the picture is, J wanted to see if we looked the same when we swapped glasses, we laughed so much and he thought it was great that “Mummy could fit his glasses on her head too even though it’s much bigger than a kid’s head!”  

This was taken at the start of the last of the very few nights out that I’ve had since J was born. Last year I went out with my lovely Mummy friends on a 70′s night. We all dressed for the occasion, (I hope they don’t mind me putting this on here), we danced, we sung, we had a great time.  This photo reminds me of some of the great friends I have back in England and always makes me smile.  

Finally, (because I don’t want to overload you with pictures, I have soooo many that make me smile!),   This picture shows quite possibly the best smile in the world  

Read Full Post »

Positively Brilliant!

I thought I’d share our day with everyone.

Today was a day that I was dreading, we had to go into the city on the train to J’s “Initial Assessment” appointment at the therapists and then get the train back. Usually when we go into the city or to appointment we all go but today it was just J and myself, (Daddy had to work).

After having our special day yesterday we all woke up feeling relaxed, then J asked if he could go on the Wii, I reminded him of our appointment and explained that we wouldn’t have time to play on it before we left but if he was very good he could have a go on it when we got home.  We had tears, a little shouting and moaning……….. but no meltdown. When he’d finished his little moment he ate his breakfast, chose what he wanted to wear, brushed his teeth, helped me to pack his bag and decided on a snack to take with us, I was amazed!   He then said, “I’ve been good now so can I go on my game?” LOL  Obviously I repeated what I’d already told him and told him he could watch Chuggington, then we would have to go. This time all I got was abit of moaning and face pulling.  Whilst he was watching his programme I noticed that he was biting his fingers, something he does alot of when he’s worrying, getting cross, frustrated etc so I could tell he was already starting to feel anxious about our trip.

We left the house without too many problems, arrived at the train station and discovered that there wasn’t a single tiny place left for us park so we had to drive up to the shopping centre, abandon the car there and walk back to the station.  J is always full of energy, he doesn’t stop moving but if you ask him to walk somewhere his legs suddenly hurt and won’t move.  I’d already foreseen all of this and so had around 30 minutes to complete the 5 minute walk. I did give in at one point and carried him for a couple of minutes but he did end up walking most of it,  Well Done J!

Here’s where the day got better, WOW I was so proud of J……… he then sat, with me, on a very crowded train playing his Gameboy for the whole journey, almost an hour!!!  No outbursts, no rude comments, no random screaming or shouting, just a very quiet little boy!

When we arrived at our stop he had a little growl at someone and called them stupid because they wouldn’t move to let us get off the train so we had to squeeze past but I felt like growling at them too so I think I’ll let him off with that.  

We then took 20 minutes to walk to the clinic, which was really just another 5 minute walk but we had to keep stopping, his legs hurt. LOL    We had a lovely time at the clinic talking to a very nice lady, mostly talking about J’s quirks/issues and the best ways in which they may be able to help. She was very helpful and friendly and most importantly listened.  Whilst we were talking J played with his Gameboy and with building blocks, he’s always loved blocks, and although he kept interrupting, (because that’s just what he does, it’s one of his social quirks),  and after a while got a little agitated and wanted to go, (most 4 year olds would probably get like this after a while), he was extremely well behaved.  Once again, Very Proud Mummy!!!

We had a few minor moments walking back to the train station and the walk took almost 30 minutes, we ended up missing our train because we’d taken so long.  We had to wait 25 minutes for the next train!  He wasn’t happy about waiting but we got his snack out and managed to make it last the whole 25 minutes.

We got on the train and found some seats for the journey home. J decided he wanted to eat his crisps on the way home so out they came and he sat very quietly for around 40 minutes eating one packet of crisps.  The train was almost empty on the journey home so much quieter and no chance of someone brushing against him……………. then he shouted “What’s that smell has someone farted!!!!” Then continued with, “I don’t like it, it smells horrible, I need to get off now, I think it was that man” and pointed.  Now I’ve gotten to a place where, whilst I am slightly embarrassed, I don’t really care what other people think, it makes me a little angry inside when people make comments or stare because those people just make things worse, but today I really didn’t care what everyone else on the train thought about my son and my parenting skills. I did ask J to talk instead of shouting and explained that it wasn’t nice to shout things like that and tried to calm him down. Then the train stopped at the next station and the man got off………….. mmmmm something we said?  LOL    J immediately calmed down and the last 10 minutes of our journey was almost uneventful, he started to get bored and just wanted to get off the train.

When we got off the train I carried him for half of the walk back to the car, a deal we had made whilst on the train and he walked the other half.

When we got home as promised I let him play on his game and his only big explosion of the whole day came when I turned the game off, but that was expected, it always happens.

Overall we’ve had a great day, 2 good days in a row……………. mmmmmm wonder what tomorrow will bring!  lol

As for today, Well done J, I’m very proud of you, I know you’ve had a few minor moment s but overall I think you’ve been Positively Brilliant!  xxxxx

Read Full Post »

Our Special Day

This is the name that J has given to a day that he and I spend together doing whatever, (within reason of course), he wants to do. It’s a day that I don’t switch the computer on until our special time has finished, usually when Daddy gets home.  It’s a day when J gets to choose what games we play or which movies we watch. It’s a day when J gets to choose what we have for lunch and where we eat it. It’s a day that we had today.

It started last night at his bedtime, as I tucked J into bed and gave him a kiss and a cuddle, (when he’d finished his usual routine), he asked me “Can we have a special day tomorrow?”  I immediately thought what a great idea, we could have a day of fun before we have our day in the city. So I quickly told him yes and he went off to sleep with a big smile on his face and I went to bed hopeful that our day of fun might mean a less stressful  more relaxed day the next day when we have our train journeys and clinic appointment in the city to deal with.

When he woke up this morning, (amazingly slept through the night 2nd night in a row!), he gave us a cheery “Morning!” followed very quickly by, “Oooh don’t forget you said we could have a special day today, have you forgot?” I reassured him that I hadn’t forgotten and that I was just going to have a cup of coffee and then our day would start. He asked if he could have a couple of biscuits for breakfast, normally I would go back with something like, “you can have cereal, toast, bread or fruit”, but today was a special day. Besides once in a while won’t hurt……… he then asked if he could eat them in the living room, now he was pushing it but I told him yes if he promised not to make a mess. I explained that if he made a mess, (when he crumbed them, which I knew he would), I would have to clean the mess up and that would mean less playtime. Yes I could have said he would have to clean it up but with his dirt/mess issues that would never happen and even suggesting it could have set him off and I didn’t want meltdowns today, so anything I could do to prevent one was worth doing.

After breakfast, surprise, I had to clean all the crumbs up so out came the hoover, J doesn’t like the hoover he says it’s too loud. So I was waiting for the eruptions when he said, “Ooops sorry I didn’t mean to make a mess, I hope you’re not cross. It’s ok I know you have to hoover it up so I’ll just pretend that I can’t hear it”………. erm ok so who is this child and what have you done with J?  I got it all cleaned up as quickly as I could and then moved on to getting dressed, usually more issues here………. today he asked if he could wear his pyjamas all day, I told him that was fine, we weren’t going anywhere so no problems there.

We sat together and watched Oggy and The Cockroaches, (one of his favourite cartoons) and then he asked if we could play on his Wii game. We’ve actually taken the game away for a month due to all the negative behaviour we’ve had recently and it’s also a game that I absolutely hate playing, it’s very hard to play and we quite often “die” or I do it wrong and of course these things usually lead to meltdowns. However, today was a special day so I agreed but only for 1 hour. “Deal” he said with a smile on his face,  wow I had such a happy boy today!  :)   We had a dodgy moment during play but I put the Wii remote down and told him that I wouldn’t pick it up again until he stopped shouting and being silly…….. the shouting continued for about 10 minutes but then once he’d stopped, as promised I picked the remote up and continued playing, happy boy once again. After an hour I told him we had to turn the Wii off but we could do something else and asked him what he would like to do.

He ran to his playroom and came out with one of his Power Rangers DVD’s. With a sigh I put the DVD on and then we got the toys out, we always play with his Power Rangers whilst we watch them. Power Rangers are one of his favourite things in the world, he’s obsessed with them!  We built Megazords for about 20 minutes and then we just snuggled up together and watched the rest of his DVD.

Lunch – one of the worst times in our house usually!  Today J decided he wanted cheese on toast, cut into triangles, on a flower plate and he wanted to have a picnic in the living room whilst we watched more power rangers! I told him yes but only if we used the special picnic blanket, (that would collect the crumbs)  ;)   He didn’t eat very much and had a minor moment afterwards because he was messy but I cleaned him up told him he could change his pyjamas. I asked him if he wanted more pyjamas or if he wanted to get dressed, he replied “well I was going to put my shorts on but I can’t now because it’s afternoon and I have to get dressed in the morning” bless him!  We chatted about this for a few minutes but I was getting nowhere fast and he was starting to get a little agitated so I then reminded him it was a special day so he could get dressed whenever he wanted……… seemed to do the trick.

After lunch we spent almost an hour on the Wii Fit, (bit of exercise), then spent the rest of the afternoon playing computer games, (J’s other obsession, he’s very good at computer games), and playing with his “blowers”, (I don’t actually know the name of these toys but J calls them his blowers, they’re sensory toys).  Few little moments during play and when I said time to turn off the computer games but no big meltdowns.

Once Daddy arrived home our special day was over but he has continued to play nicely, (he’s playing with Daddy now),  with only a few minor moments, no big meltdowns today, which is fantastic!

I don’t how bedtime will go because that’s a whole different story but J seems very relaxed today and a result of his good mood is that I’m feeling more relaxed and a little less anxious about tomorrow.  I know it’s still going to be a tough day, for both of us, but I hope that having our special day today will somehow have a positive effect on both of us tomorrow.  :)

Read Full Post »

Fun With Shaving Foam!

This week I decided to do a little work on J’s “dirty” issue. J hates being dirty, in particular he hates having dirty hands, it’s been the cause of many meltdowns, he very rarely does anything arty, (I’m talking about paint, glue etc), he doesn’t play in dirty puddles, (clean ones are ok to jump into with wellies on! LOL), and so on.  So I was trying to think of something that he used to enjoy doing, many months ago, and I decided on shaving foam. Not only is shaving foam “messy” but he could also draw pictures in it, so arty, and it would also provide J with a sensory activity.

I was unsure how he would react at first, I tried to get him excited happy about trying something new that we hadn’t done in a very long time and even took him with me to the shop to buy the shaving foam.

He got changed into some old clothes. We put the messy mat on the floor and I squirted lots of shaving foam out onto the mat, he wouldn’t squirt it out but thought the noise the can made was very funny, he said “it sounds like it’s farting!” with a giggle  -   good start!  :)

He  was very cautious to start with, only just touching it with his hands but gradually his hands began to explore the shaving foam further.

Then after about 1/2 an hour of drawing circles in the shaving foam and squishing it in his hands he shocked me and asked if he could put his feet in it!  Of course I quickly told him yes!

Again very cautiously he started to put his toes into the shaving foam and then he started picking the shaving foam up with his hands and covering his feet with it!

I was amazed at how well the activity went, after almost an hour he was actually sitting in it!

Of course he then decided that he’d had enough, asked me to wash his clothes and insisted on having a bath, but he actually sat in it!  I asked him if he liked the shaving foam, he looked at me with a forced smile and said “yes but I’ve had enough now”

I think the shaving foam may well come out again soon.  :)

Read Full Post »

Anxious, Worried, Nervous?

Anxious, worried, nervous? …………………. yep all of those feelings are starting to creep up on me.

J has his first therapy session with some ASD experts this week and in order to get there I will have to do one of two things. I’ll  have to drive into the city, which let me tell you is not going to happen. I’m a nervous driver, (I’m not worried about my driving it’s some of the idiots that are allowed to drive),  J get bored very quickly in the car, meltdowns can occur if I put the wrong song on the radio, if the sun is “getting him”, if he feels the seatbelt is rubbing, if he feels too hot and so on,  and then there’s the traffic. J had a meltdown once when we were in the UK, I was driving up the motorway and he decided that he couldn’t possibly have his seatbelt on anymore and even tried opening the door! Obviously you can’t just pull over when you’re on the motorway so I had to find the nearest exit, I managed to lock his door and threatened to throw his favourite cd out of the window if he took his seatbelt off!  It was the worst journey ever, I can’t tell you how scared and panicked I was that day!   Driving into the city would mean driving through lots of lights, lots of traffic, trying to avoid the toll roads, (otherwise would then have to take J to the petrol station when we get back to pay the tolls), possibly dealing with meltdowns etc from J and then trying to find somewhere to park.  So think we’ll leave the car at home.

Luckily for us the clinic, (I’m told), is about a 5 minute walk from the train station. So I’m thinking should ensure I have 1/2 hour to do this walk with J because no doubt along the way he will want to pick flowers and maybe add a few rocks/stones to his collection.  However usually when we go into the city or if we see a doctor type person, (they’re all doctors in J’s eyes), we all go.  This time round hubby couldn’t get the time off, he’s had alot of time off due to appointments with J lately and has a few more days next month also, so to ask for more was something he was unable to do.  So it will be just J and myself! We’ll be on the train for almost an hour, it stops at every station, there will be all sorts of smells, sights and sounds that will no doubt annoy J and even though we’ll take his gameboy, he’s going to get bored, just as most children his age would.   When we get off the train we’ve got to navigate the station, trying not to brush against anyone, (he can be very sensitive to touch), then we’ve got to walk to the clinic, speak with the specialist and then get ourselves home again.

I’m dreading it!

I know I should try to think positive, afterall we may not have any “moments” at all, very unlikely but you never know. Last time we went to an appointment in the city, J had a meltdown because he wanted a bee sticker, (he was talking to it as though it was a real bee), that was stuck to a shop window, he had another meltdown in the pediatrician’s room just because, in fact it was so bad that hubby had to take him for a walk, he had to be carried part of the way, (that was another 5 minute walk) because he couldn’t possibly walk and started to become very agitated on the train journey home. At least on this trip we were both there dealing with it all together, this time it’ll be just me.  I know I’ll be fine and I’ll deal with whatever happens but what I’m really worried about is reactions from other people. When we’re both there, we share the worry but when it’s just me I can’t help but open my big mouth!  This of course doesn’t help because then I really do look like “one of those parents” and I just end up getting really   more stressed, which again doesn’t help the situation.  Also J’s aggression has been particularly bad the past few weeks and I’m already imagining all sorts of scenarios.  I know I shouldn’t presume, that’s something I have learnt about ASD but I can’t help but worry panic about what might happen when we go on our little journey.

Anyone got any tips on how to cope with journeys/trips?

Read Full Post »